Over the weekend, Tess and I were partaking in some scrumptious saltado at Mario’s Seafood and Peruvian and we started talking about what foods we would include if we made a top 5 list of food items that we’ve ever ordered. It occurred to me that as fun as it was to come up with my own list and discuss it with Tess, the fun would multiply if I got some of my friends involved too!

In the same vein as Food Network’s The Best Thing I Ever Ate, I’m posting some lists from some good friends – whose palates I respect and trust. So here are the rules:

• The food item MUST be ordered and paid for at some sort of food vendor. They can include restaurants, cafes, stands, carts, trucks, etc.
• It can be served during any meal – breakfast, brunch, lunch, dinner, late-night eats, whatever.
• It can be any course – appetizer, main course, side dish, dessert, snack
• The list isn’t in any particular order

When I first mentioned this to my friends, they were concerned that it would be too hard because ALL food is fair game. It was suggested to separate the list into categories – top 5 main courses, top 5 desserts, etc. But I say eff that! You just get 5 and you’re forced to ask yourself some tough questions. Questions like “Do I REALLY love this cupcake from Magnolia Bakery?” or “Do I REALLY prefer a Red Velvet cupcake (overrated) to the porterhouse steak at Peter Luger’s?”

So the votes are in and here they are. For the regulars who read this blog (all 4 of you), I encourage you to chime in with your own top 5 or even just an entree you simply could not live without eating again.

ANTON

• Office Burger – Father’s Office – Culver City, CA
  I’ve mentioned this in a previous post, but Father’s Office is the FIRST place I take guests/friends to when they’re in town. The combination of flavors for this burger surpass most other things I’ve eaten in my life. I once had an Office Burger twice in the span of 3 days.
• Lamb and Rice Plate – Halal Cart on 53rd and 6th – Manhattan, NY
  There are few things I crave, and this probably tops the list since I don’t have access to it anymore. It’s the best $6 you’ll ever spend.
• Lomo Saltado – Mario’s Peruvian and Seafood – Los Angeles, CA
  This was the first lomo saltado I’ve ever had and remains my favorite among the handful of Peruvian restaurants I’ve visited. You can’t go wrong with a stir fry of marinated steak, red onions, tomatoes, cilantro and french fries – yes, french to the muthafuckin’ fries! It’s served over some lightly seasoned rice and a lemon wedge.
• Carne Asada Super Burrito – Taquería Cancún – Mission District – SF, CA
  This is the burrito against which all others are measured. I’ve been in LA for over a year now and haven’t found anything that can touch Cancun. The carne asada is well marinated and has a nice crisp to the edges. The rice is lightly seasoned. They also give you half and avocado’s worth of slices inside. Combine that with their spicy avocado-jalapeno-onion-cilantro salsa and  you’re golden my friend.
• Ono Nigiri – Sushi Central – Palms, CA
  It was between this and their signature sushi, spicy tuna (which beat Bobby Flay in the spicy tuna Throwdown). But this fish is practically a slice of heaven on top of a nugget of rice. The best part of this sushi is they take a creme brulee torch and lightly broil the top of the fish. The oiliness of the fish creates a buttery smokiness once it’s torched. And with a touch of ponzu (or yuzu – I can’t remember), it’s seriously the best sushi I’ve ever tasted.

HONORABLE MENTIONS:
- Spaghetti Carbonara – Puccini – Hell’s Kitchen, NY
- Combination Chicken Wings (spicy & soy-ginger) – Bon Chon – Manhattan, NY
- Crab and Pork Soup Dumplings – Joe’s Shanghai – Chinatown, NY

TESS

• Ají de Gallina – El Rinconcito Peruano – Queens, NY (but used to be in Hell’s Kitchen)
• Lamb and Rice Plate – Halal Cart on 53rd and 6th – Manhattan, NY
• Lomo Saltado – Mario’s Peruvian and Seafood – Los Angeles, CA
• Black Linguine Con Frutta di Mare – Puccini – Hell’s Kitchen, NY
• Office Burger – Father’s Office – Culver City, CA

HONORABLE MENTIONS:
- German Chocolate Cake – Amy’s Bread – Hell’s Kitchen, NY
- Coconut Cake – Amy’s Bread – Hell’s Kitchen, NY
- Black & White Cookie – Roxy Delicatessen – Times Square, NY

MELISSA

• Pork Kra Pow with Fried Egg – Thai Temple – Fremont, CA
  Nothing in the world is as good as this dish.  Thai food at its finest.
• Salted Caramel Pot de Créme – Starbelly – Castro-SF, CA
  When I taste it, I want to jump in the pot so I can eat every last bite.  Don’t eat it with the cookie.
• Pork Belly Special – Bouchon – The Venetian-Las Vegas, NV
  By far THE BEST dish I have EVER eaten. I have yet to eat it again, but I have hope that the stars will align and that special will be served the next time I go there.
• Clay Pot with Chicken – Gochi – Cupertino, CA
  I like EVERYTHING there, but if I had to pick one, this would be it. Crunchy Rice is SOOOOOO good.
• Salted Caramel Ice Cream – Bi-Rite Creamery – San Francisco, CA
  Hands down the best ice cream I have EVER had.  I wouldn’t be able to live knowing I couldn’t eat this.

HONORABLE MENTIONS:
- BLT – Mustard Seed – Davis, CA
- Seared Fois Gras – Chapeau – San Francisco, CA
- Salt and Pepper Chicken – House of Orient – Campbell, CA (RIP)

DAVE

• Gyro & Chicken Plate – Halal Cart on 53rd and 6th – Manhattan, NY
  For $6 bucks this is the tastiest deal you will ever find.  I never go to New York without making a stop to the 53rd and 6th halal cart.  Rain or snow… seriously, I’ve waited in line in the rain and snow for this plate.
• French Toast – The Country Way – Fremont, CA
  I challenge anyone to find a better French Toast than The Country Way.  I guarantee you won’t.  Texture, thickness, flavor.  It’s the perfect French toast.
• Wasabi Poke – Yamma’s Fish Market – Honolulu, HI
  I love poke.  There are many places you can find great poke in Hawaii, the fish is just so fresh.  But some how one stands out more than any of the others for me.  Yamma’s Fish Market in Honolulu.  Their fresh ahi wasabi poke is my favorite poke.  I compare every poke dish I eat to yamma’s.  In my book, Yamma’s is still undefeated.
• Dry-aged Porterhouse – Peter Luger’s Steakhouse – Brooklyn, NY
  I don’t say this often, but taking a bite out of Peter Luger’s dry aged steak was a religious experience.  There is nothing fancy about their steak.  Dry aged, minimal seasoning, cooked to RARE perfection.  It’s a testament to QUALITY MEAT selection.  Eating at Peter Luger’s changed how and where I buy raw meats for home cooking.
• Twice Cooked Soy Braised and Grilled Kalbi Style Short Rib – Alan Wong’s – Honolulu, HI
  UH-MAY-ZING.  Slow cooked.  Once for 48 hours at low heat to braise the meat in soy, then grill kalbi style.  They gave me a fork and a knife to eat it, but i didn’t need the knife.  I could have cut that meat with a feather.  And that sweet kalbi flavor… I don’t even know what to say that could justify it.  My friends who I ate with can testify to my experience.  I threw my hands up after every bite, which meant one of two things: a) “WOOO!!!” b) “fuck this, I’m never going to enjoy any meal that follows this”.  Fortunately my palate wasn’t completely destroyed.

HONORABLE MENTIONS:
- Hakulau (Kahlua turkey, spinach, onions, cranberry-mango chutney on garlic French bread) – Café Pesto – Kawaihae, HI
- Fish and Chips – Kalnikai Bar and Grill – Kailua Kona, HI
- Cinnamon Fudge Sundae apple pie, caramel topping with whipped cream – Serendipity 3 – NY

ANNA

• Squash Blossom Truffled Flatbread – COCO500 – San Francisco, CA
  This dish is seasonal, so i only have a small window to enjoy it during the summer. Paper thin flat bread covered with a trifecta of truffle oil, parmesan and squash blossom.
• Caramel Copetta with Marshmallow Sauce and Spanish Salted Peanuts - Pizzeria Mozza – Los Angeles, CA
  Caramel ice cream, marshmallow fluff and salted peanuts. I can’t believe this hasn’t been on anyone’s The Best Thing I Ever Ate yet. The sundae wasn’t invented until this one came along.  It should be canonized into sundae sainthood.
• Moule Frites – Café Chloe – San Diego, CA
  I am a lover of mussels-and it’s standard French bistro fare but Café Chloe takes it up a notch.  They vary the broth from time to time, but everytime I’ve had it it’s been really good. The mussels come in this mini cast iron pot with a tower of French fried onions AND potatoes right next to it. The disobedient fries fall into broth and soak up the goodness.
• Paté – Starbelly – San Francisco, CA
  Paté done right. smooth, creamy and well seasoned. They serve it with grilled country bread, homemade chutney and cornichons.The servers there must hate me because I go through at least 2 rounds of bread to finish up the block of pate they serve.
• Ham and Cheese Croissant – Tartine Bakery – San Francisco, CA
  Bless the bakers hearts-they are the most buttery and flakiest mofos around. The flaky layers house the melted emmenthaler and the Niman Ranch ham inside. When I want to really really bad in a very good way, I go here for breakfast. It’s so good I almost want to go to France and learn all the secrets of croissant making. Tartine brings france right in the heart of the Mission District.

HONORABLE MENTION:
- Pink Peppermint Ice Cream in a Homemade Waffle Cone – Ici – Berkeley, CA

PHUONG

• Hủ Tiếu Nam Nam – Vung Tau II – Milpitas, CA
  You have to order this dish with the mung bean (chewy and clear) noodles with the soup on the side. Served with jumbo prawn, crab claw, lean pork, and covered with ground pork in an intensely flavorful sauce. Top it off with freshly squeezed lemon and bean sprouts. The classic Vietnamese flavors of sour, sweet, and savory are all present.
• Lobster Risotto – Gary Danko – San Francisco, CA
  This restaurant is famous and well known for serving seasonal and fresh ingredients, so their menu changes with the seasons. The lobster risotto is always present; however it will be prepared differently depending on the available ingredients. It was the summer of 2003; the lobster risotto was prepared with chanterelle mushrooms and dressed with coriander oil. Coriander oil! I still stalk their website to see if this combination will return on their menu.
• French Macaroons – Bouchon Bakery – Yountville, CA
  This is a classic French pastry that so few bakeries can follow through on. Bouchon provides many flavors, all with the standard but not always present, crispy shell and chewy center.
• Snow Mountain Bun – Hong Kong Saigon Seafood Restaurant – Sunnyvale, CA
  There is something irresistible about these buns. They are only served around noon during dim sum service and they disappear fast! Sweet taro paste is wrapped in a flaky (I swear there is lard in it!) and crispy bun.
• Clams in Black Bean Sauce – BoDa Seafood Restaurant – San Jose, CA
  Simple, good, dirty fun!

HONORABLE MENTIONS:
- Falafel Sandwich – Falafel’s Drive-In – San Jose, CA
- Spinach & Mushroom Deep Dish Pizza - Zachary’s Pizza – Berkeley, CA

PROUD
(Proud is my co-worker and sits right next to me. I’m transcribing this as she recites her picks)

• Lomo Saltado with Tri-Tip – Lomo Arigato – Los Angeles, CA
• Sirloin Burger with Garlic Aioli, Jalapeno Bacon, and Smoked Mozzarella, and Portabello Mushrooms – 25 Degrees Restaurant – Hollywood, CA
• Spicy Yellowtail – Komasa Restaurant – Los Angeles, CA
• Shrimp and Cheesy Grits – The Edison – Los Angeles, CA
• Green Curry with Calf Meat and Roti – Roti Mataba – Bangkok, Thailand

HONORABLE MENTIONS:
- Lamb and Rice Plate – Halal Cart on 53rd and 6th – Manhattan, NY
- Red Velvet Bundt Cake (”love that shit” says Proud) – Kiss My Bundt – Los Angeles, CA
- Cajun Pork Chop with Sweet Corn – Random Cajun Place in Bangkok (way to be thorough, Proud)

Pretty solid list compiled here and a wide array of entrees, cuisines and price ranges! Any surprise inclusions? Any glaring omissions? Share your thoughts on our choices and even add some of your own. I’m pretty sure it’ll be a win-win for everyone.

I want to thank the contributors for racking their brains and stomachs. I know it’s hard to choose your favorite child, but list-making is fun! I also know everyone’s lists are always in flux…and it should be. Happy eating everyone! See you at the LA Street Food Fest this Saturday!

A co-worker of mine with whom I discuss movies blogged about his thoughts about the Oscar-nominated The Hurt Locker. Now Bradford is much, MUCH more critical of movies than I am. And while I don’t always agree with his assessments, I do appreciate the criticism he offers. If you don’t want to read the post, he complains the films overuse of war movie conventions cliches. What struck me were his comments regarding the protagonist Sgt. James played by Jeremy Renner.

He claims there wasn’t much character growth – at least not enough to sympathize with the character as he encounters physical and emotional obstacles throughout the story. It occurred to me that there are parallels with Sgt. James and Ryan Bingham, the protagonist in another Oscar-nominated film, Up in the Air.

Here are some excerpts from his blog post and the ensuing comments:

[AS PER USUAL, THERE ARE SPOILERS]

From Bradford’s post:

I would have loved to see Sgt. James CHANGE throughout the course of the movie. Maybe see him get more and more addicted to his job, have him start his tour with all the hope in the world, only to lose it bit by bit. Or have him start his tour completely brainwashed, but find something more important within himself outside the confines of the battlefield. ANYTHING would have been more intriguing. But instead, we got a bunch of losers who stay losers in the course of two hours. How pathetic!

I replied with this:

You say you wanted Sgt. James to CHANGE more, but I actually wanted him to change less. I felt that while it is important to have your protagonist discover something to fight for, his character just wasn’t built for that. And because of this, I never really bought the transformation that was hinted to at the end of the 2nd and into the 3rd act.

You suggest that there really isn’t an arc, but I think there is. You see him react to his surroundings and his subsequent choices go against how the character was set up. He just comes to the realization that this “new” Sgt. James isn’t for him. He makes a bad call, learns from it.

I kind of want to compare him to Ryan Bingham from Up in the Air. You see Ryan in his comfort zone and is forced to scrutinize his entire existence – what he really wants out of his life – because of a change in company policy. He goes through the motions and suddenly, he makes noble, yet characteristically unsound decisions. He gets burned and in the end you’re wondering has he REALLY changed?

Now perhaps this is where The Hurt Locker misses its opportunity. I never felt that connection with Sgt. James like I did with Ryan Bingham. Sure, the whole war thing is a bit less accessible than life in the corporate world, but if you put Ryan Bingham’s experience into Sgt. James, would you have liked it better?

Then Bradford’s reply:

I wasn’t even aware there was a hint of “transformation.” When Sgt. James wandered off to find the boy’s parents, I thought it was a foolish script twist instead of an attempt at developing his character.

I did not even see a beat where he realizes anything. The only thing that matters to him is his mission, and the outcomes seemed to have no bearing on his character. Yes, he makes a bad call and learns accordingly, but just because a kid learns to not fall off his bike, it does not exactly change or develop who he/she is.

Why do we empathize with Ryan Bingham? Maybe we don’t. I felt like Up in the Air was equally a visual punishment as it was a moral tale. Bingham is lonely, yes, and we have all felt lonely before. But Bingham chooses to be disconnected from people, like how Sgt. James chooses to go to war.

The difference? Bingham actually realizes something essential and proactively TRIES to improve his life. Has he really changed? I think so. Just a hint. Sure, he goes back on the road because his one attempt failed, but he is wiser for the ware. I can appreciate that.

Sgt. James, on the other hand, stays an arrogant loser. I don’t think he proactively tries to do anything. If nothing else, he learns that war is where he belongs. How pitiful. There is nothing hopeful, interesting, enlightening, or likable about that. It isn’t even a “dark” or “badass” revelation, since from the start, he already enjoys defusing bombs.

And me again:

“Bingham actually realizes something essential and proactively TRIES to improve his life.”

That’s it right there. With Up in the Air, the audience can see the value of not living solitary life. You can understand the value of relationships – mainly because Reitman hits you over the head with all the interview footage. With The Hurt Locker, you never really care WHY it’s important that Sgt. James goes to look for the kid’s family – important to the character.

And Bradford’s final comment:

Exactly.

I didn’t understand how or why Sgt. James went after the kid’s parents. That was the point where the movie lost me.

I thought, maybe Sgt. James was thinking about his own son? Nope. He showed no regard for his son or wife when he returned… it was pitiful.

In fact, if there was such an intended parallel between the two boys, we should have seen James with his family BEFOREHAND. THAT would have motivated the move entirely.

Oh well.

I enjoyed The Hurt Locker, but I wonder how that film would fare if it didn’t come out in the summer when the popcorn movies run circles around the more “serious, Oscar-bait” fare. Had the film been release in November or December would it have received as much praise as it is currently getting?

To expound a bit on my thoughts of Sgt. James, I too felt uncomfortable when he went to go find the kid. It is certainly interesting psychology for Sgt. James to feel more connected to an Iraqi kid than his own son, but something felt off about the development of that relationship. I suppose that’s what we want from our soldiers – we want to know that Capt. John Miller (Saving Private Ryan) was a schoolteacher. We want to see that Sgt. James isn’t just a badass who is really good at his job – that he secretly longs for an emotional connection in a war-time situation. But you either go all in or you don’t go at all.

If you keep Sgt. James as a cold, hard war machine, that’s fine. You have the opportunity to show how his persona affects the supporting characters, the other two guys in his company. The story arc would revolve around them and NOT Sgt. James – the way you see Natalie Keener’s (Anna Kendrick in Up in the Air) character evolve because of her experiences traveling all over the country with Ryan Bingham (George Clooney).

But then you have an entirely different movie.

The Heart Songs pt. 1 post was kind of fun, so I decided to start another one with John.

ANTON - After my first Comic Con experience last weekend, I began to ask myself why the science-fiction genre has gotten so much love by the populous in recent years. The genre has had its bright spots over history of film and TV.  (the OG Star Trek, Star Wars, the Alien franchise, X-Files, to name a few) And now with Battlestar Galactica finishing its run as arguably one of the best TV series of all time, and Lost - whose conventions don’t exactly fit within the sci-fi genre, but still maintains that feel – heading into it’s final season, networks are starting to gamble on shows with sci-fi premises. Of the shows slated for later this year, the ones I’m most intrigued by are V (the remake of the 80s mini-series), Flash Forward, and AMC’s The Prisoner (also a remake).

But I’m wondering – why is science fiction more accessible these days?

Ronald D. Moore (Star Trek: TNG, and BSG) mentioned the sci-fi genre allows you to view and comment on our world through a different prism. Exploring and even challenging the controversy of suicide bombing is okay when it’s happening on an entirely different planet called New Caprica thousands of years ago. It allows storytellers to tell tales about the truths that we often are too afraid to face. I’m pretty sure Gene Roddenberry said the same thing about Star Trek back in the 60s.

And while all these things are valid and noble, I feel like we might be giving audiences too much credit. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mean to downplay the intelligence of sci-fi fans – they’ve been some of the most informed and educated viewers since the beginning – but I’d venture to say this fanbase is and has been fine with being on the outskirts of the mainstream for decades.

My point is that the mainstream won’t suddenly become aware of the allegories – the bigger picture drawn between the lines. Something had to help it. And that something was the advancement of visual effects.

Audiences can only suspend their disbelief so much. At some point, your brain will realize you’re looking at a model, a matte painting, or worse yet, a man in a suit. But these days, it’s getting pretty damn close. Even watching a film like Independence Day, which was touted for its VFX prowess back in 1996. It already looks fake. Hell, even the Harry Potter movies – they “look” more and more real with each installment.

What’s happening is that viewers are willing to suspend their disbelief more and more. They forget about the “movie magic” and let themselves absorb the story and the characters. And then they’re hooked. (well, unless you’re talking about Transformers 2 and then that’s really what it is – ILM showing off what they can do)

Here’s something I read from LA Times TV critic Robert Lloyd’s review of ABC’s new space opera show, Defying Gravity, which premiered last Sunday.

The budget has gone into the spacecraft — the constructed interiors, the computer-generated exteriors — and all the outer space, which looks good enough that you never think about it not being real.”

In years past, sci-fi always encouraged you to come aboard their journey. It wanted you to stretch your imagination. But now, there’s almost no imagination necessary anymore, it’s a real world you’re looking at.

Of course, the next sentence in that review read, “The human element can be less convincing, however, with many of the characters flat or opaque, the dialogue a tad artificial. Some bits are overstated, others feel undercooked.” (For the record, the pilot definitely intrigued me. I’ll climb aboard for the next few episodes to see if it can sustain my interest.)

Your thoughts about this? Also, to what else can you attribute this sci-fi renaissance?

JOHN - My gut response at first read was to repeat what you said: technology’s caught up with our imagination.  Sci-Fi’s always explored in allegorical ways the same way “literature” did but in more fantastic ways.  Charles Dickens’ A Tale of Two Cities was full of metaphors, but I don’t know any of them.  Why?  I couldn’t sit down and read it.  How do I know there were metaphors?  My best friend in high school had a badass English teacher that pulled the fun out of it.  But, I can talk about the metaphors in mythology – Narcissus, Midas.  I can talk about comic book metaphors like Kevin Smith made Stan Lee did in Mallrats:

On dealing with the one that got away…

Stan: I created some special new superheroes. They were characters that reflected my own heartbreak and my own regrets.

Doctor doom wears body armor… To conceal his own mangled form, right? Okay. That was me beneath the armor.

The hulk — a normal guy one minute, a rage of emotions the next. Just like me when I thought about what I’d given up.

Brodie: So you created each character as a way to deal with your one big
regret.

There’s always been something grand and appealing and exciting about the fantasy of science fiction because it was far out but it spoke to our souls.

But now, what’s far out?  In Season 1 of Eureka, the whole town had a townhall meeting with the mayor on individual LCD monitors.  Now, that can REALLY happen with iPhones.  I think the appeal of science fiction, nowadays, is that is far closer to reality than falsity.

Remember the run of superhero movies in the 80s and early 90s?  Let’s take away the first two Superman films and the first two Batman films.  What did you have left?  Made for video farces of Captain America, successful but still kinda campy shows of Incredible Hulk and Wonder Woman, and Dolph Lundgren “acting” as Frank Castle.  Bleh.  (Except for Lynda Carter.)  Well, bleh as in visual appeal.

Ironically, the best of those superhero movies came from well-made films and character driven scripts.  Same as Empire Strikes Back.  Sure, they had good visual effects of the time, but we remember them so fondly because they were good films.  I don’t think much has changed in terms of quality.  For every Spider-man 2, X2, and Hellboy 2 we have Daredevil, Ghost Rider, and Elektra (all from the same writer/director, mind you.)  Those first three movies have studio backing and high-priced creators at the helm.  I can only assume they sign on to the movies because their visions for the stories will actually be created.  Artists have magical palettes, now.

I think the same goes for television.  The quality of visual effects is the honey to the masses.  I love Lost, but I’m not sure how fast it would’ve caught fire if the plane crash, the smoke monster, and the polar bear weren’t part of Season One’s scenery.  Overall, television budgets are getting more than they have in the past and they also attract more big time producers, creators, and actors.  Basically, there’s money and leverage to play the sci-fi game and play it correctly.

So, my gut reaction was to agree with you.  But what fun is that?

As I reread your post, what I noticed was this weird dynamic between the ideas of “science fiction” and “reality”.  Sci-fi is becoming close to reality.  But on television, we’re recovering from an influx of SURREAL reality programming.  Yes, I know it still exists, but at least the hyper sleazy and cheap ones aren’t AS common as they were in the early OHs.  We also are inundated with REALITY from 24-hour news stations that can equally be questioned for their quality of reality.  Plus, we have access to “information” on the internet in our pockets.  So, what am I trying to say?

Fiction is closer to reality for most people.  Reality is knowing that Adama and Roslin are going to make some life and death decisions that neither they nor us, as viewers, will completely agree with or reject.  Reality is knowing that Peter Parker is a really good guy and that Mary Jane should’ve been casted differently.  Reality is that Jack Carter (and we) will hear some unintelligible science jargon but he will be able to flip that with a hokey anecdote and save everyone from yet another catastrophe.  Reality is in the fiction because even if we know it’s not real at least we’re only a hop, skip, tweet away from it becoming our reality.

In the spirit of (Bill) Simmons vs. (Chuck) Klosterman and Simmons vs. (Malcolm) Gladwell, Al-Jay and I decided to come up with our own discussion about random topics. What started out as a discussion about Michael Bay quickly digressed to hip-hop tracks of our youth. So on to our inaugural discussion.

D(elfino) – If you could compare Michael Bay to a director from another era, who would it be and why?

M(angay) – See, you already started off on the wrong foot. You were supposed to ask the questions and then deliver YOUR answer. You would tell us who that person is and why, then I’d hit back with who I think; etc. Basically you’re setting me up with a softball and I reply in kind. ha!

D – Yeah, I was tired. I’m already bored of that question. I’ll think of something a little bit better.

M – But since you asked, I’d compare Sir Bay to one Steven Spielberg. I know, I know, I can hear the hater groans from miles away but stay with me for a sec…or don’t.

D – Weezer has a song from their Red Album titled “Heart Songs” which is pretty much an homage to some of the memorable songs of Rivers’ childhood. The chorus goes like this:

These are my heart songs.

They never feel wrong.

And when I wake for goodness sake,

These are the songs I keep singing.

So let’s go one heart song at a time. Amongst the top:

The Pharcyde – “Passin’ Me By”

By far the quintessential hip-hop joint of my adolescence. It’s insane how complete this track is. That first 4-count, then probably one of the freshest samples EVER comes in. Then the bassline and drums start hitting. And you top it off by Fatlip w/ arguably the best opening lines of all time, “Now in my younger days I used to sport a saaaaaaaag…”

And you know, I realize now another reason I like this song so much – the topic. It’s a freakin’ song about unrequited love! For years before AND after this song came out, MCs have always rapped about the girls they can get. While the Dogg Pound just wanted to Fu-u-u-uck You and 50 was into having sex, not into makin’ love, but not these guys. I mean, c’mon, check out these lyrics right here:

Then I signed sincerely the one who loves you dearly, ps love me tender

The letter came back three days later: return to sender

I would raise my hand to make her stagger to my desk and

Help me with my problem, it was never much

Just a trick, to smell her scent and try to sneak a touch

Oh, how I wish I could hold her hand and give her a hug

For all the hip-hop fans, especially in our generation, it would shock me if this song does not have a spot in the top 10, if not top 5.

Your thoughts?

M – Methinks you have Bootie Brown mistaken for Fatlip, who coincidentally I hear is a cousin or distant some such to Ice Cube who was instrumental in them getting signed. So there’s your six degrees of Hip Hop…without “No Vaseline” there’d be no “Passin’ Me By” which I think you should now withdraw from your Top Five since well, you mistook Bootie Brown from Fat Lip.

As for me, I’m actually more partial to Slim Kid Tre’s opus for unrequited love. It hit home more to me since he played that guy that would admire the girl from afar and never have the gumption to approach honeydip. What can I say? My wasted youth identifies more inline with those lonely stalker attributes in his stanza’s soliloquy.

It’d be hard for me to pin down a Top 5 without a month’s worth of soul searching and extensive eardrum abuse, but I can assure you that “Passin’ Me By” would be in the vicinity since it was widely used in my wedding’s picture montage. Even though I did get the girl in the end unlike our 4 heros, it still resonates to this day…

But what about a track like “Drink The Pain Away” by Mobb Deep? I’ll submit that while it’s a bit cruder, the sentiments of love and love loss hit home harder. i.e;

Now me and Dany, we been together ever since

Our love combines to form a science, what is this

Prodigy just intimated that his love for someone created a whole system of knowledge that could be studied infinitely by countless individuals who ultimately could never ever come to a conclusive answer to: “what is this?”

That’s some deep shit.

Or just gangster.

D – Doh! Busted! So here’s my first disclaimer: My hip-hop knowledge is not as comprehensive as yours. But I like what I like.

So I got the wrong MC, but no way I’m withdrawing it. There aren’t many songs that bring back such fond memories of breakdance practice, so I need this one. You know, we never really practiced to this song, but it’s what we’d always play it afterwards, sitting Indian-style around the edge of the linoleum drinking Tang or Nestea.

I can appreciate the rawness in that Mobb Deep track, but submitting to vices on the path to self-destruction is so cliché. Yeah, the beat is tight and the flow is dope, but not likely to the first track I’d put on when Tess leaves me for Jensen Ackles.

Oh, and your point about the whole science thing…yeah, I got nothing, man. Haha. If it is indeed what you’re saying it is, then yes…it’s deep AND gangster.

So we’ve covered loving from afar and loving when it’s gone. But how about love that’s right in front of you. A song that came up was Jurassic 5’s “Thin Line” (featuring pre-Loose Nelly Furtado).

But to me girl, you’re still off limits

No matter all the times that I hinted.

Infatuation was authentic, but yo I just pretended

So I wouldn’t lose the friendship

It’s not quite waxing poetic about love and science and the cosmos (or any other gangster things for that matter), but I don’t think it’s a topic that a group like Mobb Deep would touch with a 10-ft pole. Can you think of any other tracks out there that explore this issue – preferably something “cruder” like in you previous example?

Oh and real quick…pick one: Mary J. Blige (feat. Smif n Wessun) “I Love You” or Method Man & Mary J. “All I Need“? And a bonus question: Do you think the Method Man track would be different if it was Total on the vocals instead?

M - Off the top of my head, “Me & My Girlfriend” by the immortal 2Pacalypse. While the simile may put off most because of the thug content; dude was a poet of the highest caliber and he knew what he was doing there. Jay Z’s lazy ass attempt to capitalize on his shine is NO FUCKING comparison to the original.

Okay, so lets deconstruct the two choices you give me. I can see why you might have lumped those two songs together because it can be construed that they’re both thematically “love songs” and that’s what this discourse has been so far. But I argue that “I Love You” isn’t a typical love song per se, but more of a reflection on a state of mind. “I Love You” is good even in that sense, but I would go with “Wreckonize” over “I Love You” anytime. Peep the script:

Situations

Got me thinking about my life seriously

Keep it real continuously

Before I slip into blackness I prepare for combat

Protect my dome cause that’s where my home’s at

Those introspections trump the sliver of track they were allowed on “I Love You” tenfold.

And while “I Love You” and “Wreckonize” are bangers, I gots to go with Meth and Mary. To this day I dedicate lines from that song to my Wife on greeting cards…that’s lasting power that even Hallmark couldn’t monetize. With that track, Meth locked down that sensitive thug persona until Common jacked it and pissed it all over the place and now we have Kanye. I don’t think anyone really won in the end. Us or them, ha!

No way that track is anything though without Mary. If Total, or Xscape for that matter, were slotted in the world as we know it would have been denied a classic. Yeah, I just did that. I threw out that hyperbolic word: classic. Deal with it.

Also, the romantic dexterity of my youth would have been that much lamer without that song.

But back to my point: Michael Bay is this generation’s Steven Spielberg. I’m not even gonna try to defend that statement; I’m just gonna let it fester for a few years and eventually watch the fruition of my predication unfold for all to see…

D – God, just listened to Xscape again – they don’t sing very well. But I guess that was the vocal stylings of the time.